amsterdammer

amsterdammer
Ik Ben Ajacied

All You Need is AJAX

All You Need is AJAX
All You Need is AJAX

Kamis, 28 Juli 2011

insomnia strikes again brotha!

Almost 6 in the morning

MAMAMAMA YUKERO
MAMA YUKERO
MAMA YUKERO MAMA

I'm bored :(

I have NOONE to talk to, I have NOWHERE to go... I have NO FACEBOOK to wail on and my Twitter account has reached its 1,234th post which I just can't ruin it (OCD?) so I'll just talk to myself :3 -- I love talking to myself

Talking about OCD, I THINK I might have OCD O:)

According to The Great Wikipedia, OCD is :

Obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder characterized by intrusive thoughts that produce uneasiness, apprehension, fear, or worry, by repetitive behaviors aimed at reducing the associated anxiety, or by a combination of such obsessions and compulsions. Symptoms of the disorder include excessive washing or cleaning; repeated checking; extreme hoarding; preoccupation with sexual, violent or religious thoughts; aversion to particular numbers; and nervous rituals, such as opening and closing a door a certain number of times before entering or leaving a room. These symptoms can be alienating and time-consuming, and often cause severe emotional and financial distress. The acts of those who have OCD may appear paranoid and potentially psychotic. However, OCD sufferers generally recognize their obsessions and compulsions as irrational, and may become further distressed by this realization.

I have very much time to waste, so I'll examine the character one by one :D

intrusive thoughts that produce uneasiness, apprehension, fear, or worry, by repetitive behaviors aimed at reducing the associated anxiety, or by a combination of such obsessions and compulsions

Intrusive thoughts are unwelcome involuntary thoughts, images, or unpleasant ideas that may become obsessions, are upsetting or distressing, and can be difficult to manage or eliminate.

:O those kind of thought are what running through my mind, like, everytime I'm idle :?

Let's move on; that produce uneasiness, apprehension, fear, or worry, by repetitive behaviors aimed at reducing the associated anxiety, or by a combination of such obsessions and compulsions

I think those pretty much describe myself, I'm just gonna copy those words to the "About Myself" field on every accounts I have :3 and it'll be like : I constantly have intrusive thoughts that produce uneasiness, apprehension, fear, or worry.

"I thought OCD is a bad thing"-- said voice in my head

OK, next thing is...
Symptoms of the disorder include excessive washing or cleaning; repeated checking; extreme hoarding; preoccupation with sexual, violent or religious thoughts; aversion to particular numbers; and nervous rituals, such as opening and closing a door a certain number of times before entering or leaving a room.

Symptoms of the disorder include excessive washing or cleaning -- I am used to doing excessive washing when I was a kid. I was a clean-freak. I never want to touch anyone,anything,I don't want to share the same straw with anyone else, I remember crying when my sister refused to give me a clean pants after she dropped the pants I was about to wear, everytime I get fever or I don't feel my body is doing right I'd be thinking "I'M GONNA DIE VERY SOON, THIS IS A RARE DISEASE" and no, I'm not exaggerating :D thankfully I'm recovered -- recovered, as if it's a disease for staying clean

repeated checking -- I still do this until NAO. Everytime I'm done with something, I'll check it hundred times to make sure it has been done smoothly. I even STARE at my paper assignments or my exam's answer sheets, at the name & roll number columns to check if it's THERE, or if I'd written it clear enough for my lecturers to read... say FML but I just NEED to do it.

extreme hoarding -- sorta, I feel the need to collect bills, my old text books or exam results from High School, MY ASSIGNMENTS :D -- hoarding is not the same with procrastinating -_-

preoccupation with sexual, violent or religious thoughts -- Who doesn't preoccupied with sexual thoughts? *cough* but preoccupied with violent thought is just wrong, and religious thoughts... uh, I believe what I believe, I don't remember ever preoccupied in religious thoughts, unless someone brought up the topic.

aversion to particular numbers; and nervous rituals, such as opening and closing a door a certain number of times before entering or leaving a room. -- I don't do these things :D

Wikipedia also stated that "The acts of those who have OCD may appear paranoid and potentially psychotic." (2011)

Maybe I am paranoid. A friend pointed that out to me when I told him that I was "molested" on a public transportation

The conversation went :
"You are too paranoid"
"I am alerted"
"No, it's different"
"What's the difference?"
"It's just different..."
"-__-"

and I'm sure I don't have the potential to be a psycho!

SO the conclusion is : maybe a 50-50 chance? let's say I'm just an "ababil"

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